For the People Who Love Someone Who Is Grieving
07 of 08You can't fix their grief, but you can keep them company in it.
What can help
- Say their name. Many grieving people long to hear it.
- Offer specific, practical help: a meal, a school pick-up, help with paperwork.
- Listen without trying to make it better.
- Keep checking in after the funeral, and around anniversaries and special dates.
- Be patient. Grief can change people, sometimes for a long time.
What to avoid
- "Everything happens for a reason." Or "it was there time"
- "At least they're not suffering," or any sentence starting with "at least".
- "You need to move on" or "Stay strong."
- Avoiding them because you don't know what to say.
Grieving children
Children grieve too, though it can look different. They might seem fine one minute and deeply upset the next, or show their grief through play, behaviour or questions. Be honest in simple, age-appropriate words. Let them know their feelings are welcome, and keep routines as steady as you can. The National Centre for Childhood Grief supports bereaved children and their families.
